Bullying: How it affected us.

Narration by: Johnny

Excerpts: Tim, Johnny, Anonymous, & Anonymous

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We are the Dork of All Trades Podcast. We were called dorks. We were called nerds. We were called geeks. We were called losers. We were bullied.

We know that being bullied can be a traumatizing experience. If you ever feel you are being bullied or know someone at risk please seek help, you can report bullying to teachers, parents, or any adult you trust, if it is happening online, Report it here.

When we were kids we’ve had times where we felt helpless, even if we were afraid to admit. Growing up felt like it took forever but looking back we realized that is does get better.  The purpose of this blog is to shed light on bullying for those who may feel alone. We at DOAT were bullied, and we wanted to share these experiences. Over 160,000 kids stay home from school each day to being bullied by someone, according to bullingstatistics.org and back in the day, my cohost Tim was one of those kids.

Growing up I was one of the smaller weak kids. It also didn’t help that my last name is Berger (pronounced “burger” like the food). So I have heard almost every name, “hey, Tim Cheeseburger!” “Hey hamburger” “would you like some fries with that burger?” But nothing was worse then what I call now as “the song.” I’m not posting the lyrics.But “the song” was so bad and caused emotional torture that I didn’t want to go to school. I would cry to my mom to keep me home. It took multiple visits from my parents to get the teachers to put an end to it. Did that workt? No. The kids still did it from time to time, but it became bearable after a while, with time. Then eventually they stopped bullying me and moved on to someone else.

Bullying on a whole is wrong and needs to be stopped and prevented before it happens. “Normal is just a setting on a dishwasher machine”. There is nothing wrong with being different, sometimes being different makes you who you are.

 

3531445744_ff195f5651_zNow, to pick apart the number of times I’ve been bullied could fill up the same pages of a Vampire novel and be twice as interesting. But I wanted to focus on something that is, unfortunately, to be expected in life. We, as humans, are often met with a lack of closure. Writer Shannon Adler said, “Time doesn’t heal all wounds, only distance can lessen the sting of them”. The story I wanted to share, below, is much like that show Unsolved Mysteries, no closure.

I made friends with a kid in gradeschool; from third grade to sixth we were unseparable. We hung out during the school year, but he went away for summer. One year he came back to school, I was excited to tell him about my first kiss. He was a tad more experienced in the sexual arts, and took advantage of my innocence. While describing my summer conquests with him and other boys from our class, he asked me about ‘blowjobs’. Unsure of the difference between that and a kiss, I boasted about how good I was at giving blowjobs to my friend and his new buddies. I was catfished long before MTV made a profit on it. From that point on he teased and prodded me to no end. He grew from a good friend to an absolute dick. Not just to me, but most of our graduating 8th grade class. I can’t imagine what was going on in his life that caused him to be so obnoxious at ages 10-14.Last I heard, hard drugs had entered his life. To be fair the drug rumors are simply rumors. I have no idea what’s happened to him. Lack of closure…

Writing this took a lot of courage for some of our colleagues, because we are looking back on darker times that often aren’t worth revisiting. But somehow when the idea was kicked around, everyone was jumping at the bit to be involved. We meet many people on the road of life and often never know where people come from. It’s never fair to judge someone, even if you think you may know there whole story. The next passage’s author wanted to remain anonymous.

Being bullied began at an early age, for me. It appeared that the bullies quickly latched onto the fact that I was too nice to defend myself. Admittedly, I was an easy target. I was overweight, pale, freckled, dorky (to say the least) and taller than any other student for all of grade school. A kid who didn’t know any better would see the differences between myself and others, and found it easy to single me out, which they did. Often. Since I never stood up for myself, through the years the verbal abuse changed and strengthened. It started with name-calling and developed into being made fun of for every single solitary thing I did or didn’t do. That left a lasting impression on a person. It used to tear me up inside to know that someone would set aside their time aside just to treat me so horribly. However, I can honestly say that I might not be so kindhearted and patient these days if it had not been for the relentless bullying I undertook in my youth. So, thanks, bullies! Treating me that way made me realize how NOT to treat people, which is a lesson I’ll never forget.

2512997167_0b7de2056b_oEmotional scars run deeper than physical ones, and even though we can’t see them they are reflected in who we eventually become. Although many of us play the role of the victim and others the aggressor, some walk the line between them staggeredly. Some of us have been carried up in the moments and said something we’ve regretted a time or two. The next passage is written by a friend who let their aggressions become words they regret:

I was as brash as any other teen. I was confident in my beliefs but completely uncertain about the world around me. Hopefully this remained a brief worldview for you without doing too much damage. I said offensive things without considering the damage, just to sound cool. Sometimes my words were fueled by alcohol and hormones. I said things that a controlled, sober mind never would.  The most regretful thing I remember saying was “It’s not rape if you like it.” Although I have never, and would never, act on such a claim I remorsefully said it more than on occasion in my teens. I just hope that I never affected anyone by saying it.

The world is rough and rude. The only thing you really can control is how say things. Be careful of what you think and what you say. Even you don’t mean it, words can hurt people. Things you say in passing can have a lasting impression on people. In fact, the reason I had the idea for this blog was because of something that was said to me online a couple months ago.

I run @DBZSnaps Snapchat and often get requests for art or sent ideas for different things. This time was one such occasion; a young girl messaged me and asked if I could draw a ‘cheerleader who met her true love’. Confused, I explained that I only really draw anime and nerdy things (as the proud nerd I am), and I really didn’t do requests. Then, out of nowhere, she types, “Oh well, you probably don’t draw at all, youre just a petofile!”(I mighthave scolded her on spelling and grammar, but I just ignored her).

Be who you are, stand tall, and believe in what you must. Don’t be a dick. Also, as the great Taylor Swift says, “Haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate…”

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We are the Dork of All Trades Podcast. We are dorks. We are nerds. We are geeks. We do not tolerate bullying.

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